Women’s Month is often used to admire women for their courage and strength, but August is also a month for South Africans to say STOP, LOOK, LISTEN and HELP.
August also brings awareness about the abuse of women and children, and we at the Joburg Market are no exception.
As a woman, and working at the Market, I was a victim of abuse at home and I thought I had to hide it from friends and colleagues, and for years I did. I felt that people at work would look down on me, at this weak woman who allowed herself to be abused.
I was drowning every day and I could feel a little more of me break and die at each passing minute.
The day came where I had to say STOP! I had to make my voice heard. I had to stand up and take a long look at myself in the mirror and realise I’m not weak. I’m not the one in the wrong, I am strong, and I can stop this whenever I want to, but I had to choose to want to change what was happening to me.
No longer did I allow myself to sit in the corner and cry the nights away so that I can leave my home to find safety at work. No longer did I allow myself to hide the black and blue marks on my body and no longer was I going to be unheard.
I want to tell you the lady in the corner crying, get up. You are not alone. The lady whose body is sore from the beating, get up my sister, you are not alone. Let yourself be heard. Ask for help because we are here to help you. You don’t have to stand alone, you don’t have to cry alone. You have a family here at the Joburg Market (and in the City), and there is help.
At the Market, we have the most amazing family that’s joined together from all corners of the world. We can take a minute to STOP, LOOK around you, LISTEN to each other’s stories because these are stories that need to be heard and HELP each other. A hug, a smile, a cup of coffee and someone to talk to sometimes helps more than we will ever know.
Let’s stand up, let us protect our own. The change starts with each one of US. – The writer requested not to be identified.
Signs of abuse to look out for:
Excuses for injuries
Personality changes, low self-esteem
Missing work for unclear reasons
Wearing clothes that hide commonly abused body parts (neck and arms)
Not mixing with people around them
Severe anxiety, especially around people and loud noises
